Thursday, July 11, 2013

Legally Married

By Drew Searing • Copyright © 2013 by Drew Searing • Used by permission

Drew Searing (right) with Puma, his lawfully wedded husband of five years

My husband and I are married.  Legally married.  We were married during the “limited edition marriage special” of 2008.  This week, we are celebrating our “wooden” anniversary of being legally married for five years, alongside the 18,000 other legally married same-sex California couples.

            No, we were never UN-married by a bunch of wealthy Mormons.  Our marriage was not invalidated by Prop Hate.

            I say that we are legally married and repeat it with conviction because over the last two weeks, I’ve had nothing but good-hearted well-wishers make flat-out incorrect and unnecessary comments to my husband and I about how we will now be “really” married. 

            It all started at the Day of Decision rally June 26 where not one, but three GAY friends of mine approached my hubby and I with remarks such as, “Isn’t this great?!  Now you guys can get married again, but this time it will be for REAL!”  Another similarly quipped, “The Supreme Court has validated your marriage... Yay!”

            Then came the comments and “Congratulations” on Facebook from relatives and friends who actually attended our wedding, but still had the wherewithal to blurt out messages such as, “Now you guys are legally married in California, isn’t that wonderful?!”  It has been wonderful for half a decade, thank you.

            I repeat, my husband and I are legally married and always have been since that fateful, wonderful July afternoon during the Summer of Love.  Whereas I am happy for all of us who can get married (again), about the only thing it means for us is that we can now legally get divorced. 

            Ok maybe I’m a bit bitter because our bragging rights are over... we’re no longer the mere 18 THOUSAND who got married that summer.  It’s been a fun ride, especially come April 15th when our much-needed same-sex family tax specialist works out that it would have been about the same refund either way.  I didn’t marry him for money anyway.

            So rah rah sistah boom bah... Hooray.  Now every Californian can get married.  Let the receipts from Gay Wedding Registers save California from financial ruin.  It’s so nice to be living history.

EDITOR’S NOTE: Zenger’s proprietor Mark Gabrish Conlan and his husband Charles Nelson also got legally married during the “limited edition marriage special” of 2008. We celebrated our fifth wedding anniversary on the Fourth of July 2013 and are glad we no longer have “special rights” to be married Gay Californians.